2025 has started in mayhem. Here’s what might help.

I’ve been intentionally quiet on my blog for a couple months. As a therapist working with clients recovering from trauma, the flood of bad news has been overwhelming and dysregulating. On top of that, the new government administration brings changes that will directly impact my family and loved ones. I know I can’t support others effectively if I don’t first take care of myself and my own.

I’ve also struggled to find the right words to support my clients and my close-knit community of readers. It hasn’t been easy, but with collaboration from colleagues and insight from people I trust, I’ve put together some thoughts that I believe are worth sharing. This is the same guidance I’ve been offering my clients who say …

“I don’t know how to stop freaking the f%^& out.”:

Author Naomi Klein’s “Shock Doctrine” provides some explanation for the mayhem so many of us are experiencing: the chaos is purposeful and strategic. If our sanity is challenged, we are going to burn out. When we are stressed, we go into “fight or flight”, and we lose connection to the parts of our brain that think intentionally and with longevity. We act out of survival, but erratically. We become ineffective and lose our capacity to hold servants of public office accountable. I’ll say it again: the chaos is purposeful. 

We can begin by limiting news intake. It will never be possible to keep up with every “breaking” story. Subscribe to 2-3 reliable, reputable news sources and set the notifications to a limited number. Request that well-meaning friends and family limit their verbalization of traumatic events as well. While awareness is powerful, rumination is destructive.

“I don’t know how to start.”:

If we panic, we cannot take care of ourselves and others around us. It starts with preserving our basic needs. To reference another of my favorite activists, Tricia Hersey, “rest is resistance”. This manifesto applies particularly to marginalized groups who, for centuries, have labored to be deemed worthy of basic human rights, but we can all take a lesson from Hersey’s philosophy.

In a society that presses productivity as worthiness, focusing on our body’s recovery cycle is activism in and of itself. This looks like keeping daily rituals as best as possible – drinking water, eating nourishing foods at home, prioritizing sleep, speaking to medical professionals about adjusting psychiatric or mood-stabilizing prescriptions, and intuitively moving our bodies to protect what we can control: ourselves.

“I don’t want to start too late. I feel frozen.”:

Research has shown us the stages of community response around disasters. Everyone can interpret this information in their own way, but here’s how it speaks to me: there’s a TON of response in the very beginning, and not much when the panic wears off. Professionally, I saw this occur during hurricane recovery in Western North Carolina, where many residents are still displaced, yet attention and aid has faded. Here is what we can do to keep the line of support high on the chart: we can pace ourselves. See the next several years as a marathon, and not a sprint. While initial response is much-needed, enduring response is vital. 

“I don’t know what to do.”:

After ensuring our basic needs are met,  establishing a good, healthy baseline, and setting the pace, we can find our area of purpose. Responding to every call, attending every protest, volunteering at every nonprofit, or posting about every issue will not be effective. Each of us needs a job that speaks directly to us, that we can maintain through the next several years. How do we do this? Introspection. In an art/info collaboration between @fablefulart and @deiloh, “How to Resist an Oligarchy” outlines (in bite-sized form) how our individual skills can be honed for efficacy in communities. It’s worth checking out (and the illustrations are adorable).

We can also ask our trusted circle, “what am I good at? What do you think is my most consistent interest or talent?” We can think about our professional backgrounds and education, and utilize those skills. Knowledge is power.

“I feel so alone.”:

You are not alone, in feeling alone. I’ve heard from residents of sun-down towns and deeply red areas that, this year, it feels especially scary to walk out the front door. I can only imagine. We all have the right to exist as ourselves, with people who celebrate that existence. While community connections are essential, community doesn’t have to be geographically-local. Let’s expand the definition of “community” to include virtual settings and people outside of the local perimeter. People who “get it” are an internet search away. Finding community will be the biggest piece in getting through … this.

One last thing:

As a non-professional, after-hours human with my therapist hat set lovingly on my desk, I am terrified with you. Here’s what I keep reminding myself: we are not the first group in history to survive during unprecedented times. One of my favorite theorists, Viktor Frankl, survived the Holocaust. Here’s what he said:

“Life is never made unbearable by circumstances, but only by lack of meaning and purpose.”

By coining the term, “tragic optimism”, Frankl reminded us that we are permitted to seek contentment in times of global pain. “Happiness cannot be pursued; it must ensue.”

Take care of each other.

Disclaimer: This blog post is intended for informational purposes only and does not substitute professional therapy. For therapeutic treatment, please reach out to a qualified mental health professional.

If you or someone you know would like support, and you don’t know where to start with healing, I am here for you. Set up a free, 15 minute consultation by visiting Whippoorwill Counseling.